This is episode 239, and it’s all about what I call necessary work. Today, I’m talking about building the muscle that leads you to your goals. Whether you’re someone who loves to set goals or you shy away from them, this one is for you.

If you want to do things differently but need some help making it happen, then tune in for your weekly dose of coaching from me, Maisie Hill, Master Life Coach and author of Period Power. Welcome to The Maisie Hill Experience.

Okay, folks, it’s no secret that I am big on goals. I love them. We set them every season in my membership, Powerful, and if you’ve ever been on a call when we’re setting goals, then you know the energy that’s there. There’s usually a bit of a charge of some kind. Sometimes it’s excitement, sometimes it’s nerves. Some members are feeling a bit vomity about what they’re setting out to do. Usually, it’s just a whole mixture.

But then a couple of weeks pass and the goals are still there, but that initial charge of excitement isn’t. And this is where necessary work comes in. This is the part that it’s very tempting to try and skip or avoid, or make it mean something’s gone wrong. But really, this is the work that gets you where you want to go. So, let’s talk about what necessary work actually is, why it matters so much, and how you can build the muscle to do it, even when you’re tired, even when it’s boring, even when you really don’t feel like it.

So, when you first set a goal, there’s a bit of a buzz to it. In that moment, you have clarity. You feel clear, or at least clear enough to believe that you can figure it out. You have made a decision, so you feel decided. And even if you’re nervous, there’s a sense of, “Right, this is what I’m doing. I’m doing this.” And that early phase, whether it lasts minutes or weeks, can feel electric. And part of that is just what happens when we decide on something and commit to it. There’s dopamine, there’s endorphins, there’s momentum, there’s novelty. Your brain’s like, “Ooh, a new shiny thing. Let’s go.”

And I know I love that feeling, and I expect that you do as well. And this happens even more so when you’re doing it in community, right? That collective energy in my membership is very real. You can catch a whole vibe just being on a call where people are stating their goals, they’re declaring them, and they’re going after them. And that matters. Okay? That energy, that collective energy that’s happening on those calls, is important and useful. So we do want it to be there. It’s the honeymoon phase of goal setting.

But that feeling doesn’t last, and it’s not meant to. Don’t mistake that initial energy for how it’s supposed to feel all the way through. First of all, it would be pretty exhausting to experience that level of feeling all of the time.

So, the first lesson here is don’t make it a problem when your enthusiasm wanes or you start to feel tempted by another goal of some kind, or you think that you’ve made the wrong decision. There’s a better option for you. Okay, this is just what happens. So don’t dramatise it or think that it’s only happening to you. Okay? It is truly no big deal unless you make it a big deal. Okay?

So let’s say that you set a goal and you’re a couple of weeks in, and you could be flying with your goal. You could have actually even achieved your goal already. This happened on a call recently in the membership, and I just love it when you’re all astonished that you can achieve your goals quickly. And it’s so fun to point out when you’ve actually already done it, but you haven’t realised that you have achieved your goal.

But if you haven’t completed the goal or you’re not on a roll of some kind with it, then things are probably slowing down or they’ve ground to a halt. And that early high is gone, and now you’re just left with your goal and you’re doing the work.

So this is what I call necessary work. It’s the unsexy part of goals, and it takes up a large amount of making goals happen. It’s when you’re in the slog. It’s repetitive, it’s boring, it requires things of you, it’s challenging, or it’s just inconvenient. And it just requires you to show up when you don’t want to.

And it’s unrewarding in the moment, especially when results are slow or disappointing or invisible. And your mind will be saying things like, “Oh, this again. Why is this so hard? Why did I think this was even a good idea? Wouldn’t it be more fun to scroll TikTok or rearrange the cupboard drawers?” But this phase is where most goals actually succeed or don’t. It is the most important phase because necessary work is what gets done after that initial excitement has faded, and it’s the reps that you do here that build muscle.

Necessary work isn’t a downgrade. It might feel like it, but it’s what is going to build your identity and self-trust, which I know you’re all very keen on developing.

So let me give you an example from my life. Last year, when I was deep in rebuilding the membership, I wasn’t in a season of feeling great or experiencing flow, or being high on energy or anything like that. It was a very internal year for me. It was hard in lots of ways. I was moving very slowly and I felt quite flat. Things that weren’t normally challenging for me suddenly were. Now, part of that was down to being really iron-deficient, but it was also the end of me writing and birthing three books in five years, whilst running a business and doing multiple other things.

And at the start of last year, 2024, I had decided that it would be a year of me doing less, very intentionally. But it also ended up being the year that I lost my powers. So I’m used to being able to hyper-focus. I can sit down, get into something, and lose myself in it for hours. That’s how I create so much, as well as taking as much time to rest and rejuvenate. So this has been a big part of how I work. But that wasn’t available to me last year. It was like being Superman but going around with a tiny bit of kryptonite in my backpack.

So I was rebuilding a massive part of my business, completely reimagining and recreating the membership without my usual way of doing things. And it sucked. It really, really sucked, but I was committed to doing the necessary work to make it happen. So it wasn’t particularly fun, but I knew it was important and I felt very committed to doing it.

But this is the work that matters because you can’t rely on feeling motivated or clear or enthusiastic or excited. And you won’t always feel like you’re making progress. But if you show up anyway, if you keep doing the things that matter, no matter how small you might think they are, you will get where you’re trying to go. And it might take a lot longer than you imagined, as it did for me. I had no idea it would take me 18 months. Okay? I thought it would take four months, six months tops. So that’s quite a big difference.

So your journey to your goal might look quite different to what you thought it would be, but it will happen. And more than that, I was just explaining this to the members on a recent call, the reason we do this, other than wanting to actually create the desired result, the goal that we want to achieve, is about who we become in the process and what we overcome to do so. You become someone who can trust themselves to keep going even when that initial buzz fades.

So, I know you’re all going to want to know what’s going to help you with the process. So let’s get into that.

First, noticing when you’re expecting it to feel different. Okay? If you can let go of the fantasy that it’s meant to feel magical all the time, you’re going to do yourself a massive favour. And that doesn’t mean you have to force yourself to suffer through it. It just means you stop waiting for it to feel like it did at the start. You’re going to save yourself so much mental anguish if you can let the idea that it’s going to feel good all the time go.

Second, ask yourself, what can I do today that will support this goal? I’m going to give you some tips on how to do that in a moment.

Third, get curious about your capacity. That might mean coaching yourself on the thoughts that you have about your capacity, like, “Well, I can’t do that right now,” or, “I’ll burn out if I try to do that.” And, you know, sometimes that’s true, but a lot of the time it’s not. So you want to check, is this real? Or is this something I’m believing because it feels safer than expanding into discomfort? Or are you actually doing things the long way that does take more effort than it needs to because you’re avoiding the quick way that is going to take less time and energy but does require more courage?

And maybe you don’t have capacity to do these things in this season. And if that’s the case, you’ve got options. Okay? You can make part of your goal, whatever it may be, you can make part of achieving that goal increasing your capacity. So what are the things that will support you, nourish you, build you up so that you can create this goal or focus on other goals? Okay, there’s usually a season a year where I have this as my actual goal in some form, okay, increasing my capacity.

And maybe your capacity would increase if you had better boundaries at work or at home, or if you had a bit more community or better sleep. So these are all elements that you can make your essentials for creating your goal that’s going to help you make this goal happen.

You can also change your goal. If the one you’ve set isn’t working for you and you have explored why and you like your reasons for changing it, you could change your goal to be something like increasing your capacity. And that’s definitely not failing. That’s really wise. Or you can keep the goal the same and extend the timeline. That’s also totally valid, but I do recommend getting coached on it if you’re inside of Powerful, because that’s often a nuanced decision. Sometimes it’s very wise, and sometimes it’s avoidance in a clever disguise. So let’s work through that together if it’s coming up for you and make sure it’s a clean decision.

Okay, the fourth thing is that when the initial enthusiasm and motivation of setting a goal dies off, don’t make it a problem. Okay, if you accept that happening as part of the process, if it was an inevitable step in the creation of your goal, what changes? What do you suddenly stop resisting? And if you drop the idea that it’s just you feeling this way, if you stop using it as a reason to criticise yourself, then what does that free you up to do?

And by the way, when the excitement disappears and you start telling yourself that’s a sign to stop, what’s really happening is that your fear is kicking in. And instead of working through it, you’re entertaining an exit route. I really want you to see it that way. Okay? It’s a cop-out, and you know it is. That’s the moment where you’re either going to abandon the goal or you strengthen the muscle that is going to help you create that goal and all the ones that come after it.

My fifth recommendation is to replace the short-lived, fueled-by-dopamine energy with something long-term and sustaining, feeling committed and disciplined, for example, and then anchor into what helps you to feel that way and to be committed.

So what always works for me is connection. When I feel connected to my purpose, when I feel connected to my clients, and that includes all of you who listen to the podcast, then that creates a way for me to show up and do the necessary work. Because in that state of connection, there’s a lightness there, but there’s also great importance, and that combination gets me going.

When I think about just one person who listens to my podcast or reads my emails, and they get exactly what they need in that moment, that helps me to make it. Okay? I’m not going to use it as a way to force or cajole myself into doing things when what I actually need to do is rest, but it gets me going and it keeps me going. And I’ve done this so much for so long that I don’t actually need to do it anymore because I’ve built enough muscle through doing that, which means I can just show up. It doesn’t need to be this whole process. I can just anchor into connection and do the thing that I need to do.

So bursts of excitement are one thing, and don’t get me wrong, I love them. Those quick endorphin hits have a positive impact. They matter. But you build your future on those boring reps. Necessary work is the slow strength training. It’s the deep core work. It’s the foundational stuff that nobody sees, but it makes everything else possible.

So if you’re listening to this and thinking, “Oh, yeah, that’s me,” right? You’ve set a goal and now your brain is just digging its heels in, or you’re struggling to get back into it, or everything just feels harder or heavier than you expected it to, then this is your reminder that this is the point. This is the process. Nothing has gone wrong, unless you decide that it has. You’re just in the necessary work phase.

So here are a few questions that you can take away and use to help you when you’re in the necessary work. What’s the necessary work that’s in front of you right now, as in this week? What’s the necessary work that you need to do? Where are you waiting for motivation when you could just start? And what one thing can you do today that builds the muscle you want to have? I didn’t say 2 or 12 things, one thing. And how can you support yourself to do necessary work today? Not all of it, just some of it. And that can include asking other people for help as well.

And if you are inside the membership and you’ve got a seasonal goal that you’re working on right now, check in with yourself. Is your brain telling you that something’s gone wrong because you’re no longer excited? Is it bringing up doubts or resistance of some kind? Of course, I encourage you to get curious about why, but don’t use lack of excitement as a sign that something has gone wrong. Okay? It just means you’re bang on track and the real work has begun. If you’re in Powerful, then we’re here to support you with coaching at Ask a Coach, in the community, and on our calls. And we will help you to do that necessary work, because you can do it.

Okay, folks, have a cracking week, and I will catch you next time.

Hey, if you love listening to this podcast then come and check out my membership, Powerful, where you get my best resources and all the coaching you need to transform your inner and outer life. Sign up to the waitlist at maisiehill.com/powerful, and I’ll see you in the community.