If you are in the horrors with menstrual cycle issues or you want to learn how to harness your hormones, then you are in the right place.

Welcome to the Period Power podcast. I’m your host Maisie Hill menstrual health expert, acupuncturist, certified life coach and author of Period Power. I’m on a mission to help you get your cycle working for you so that you can use it to get what you want out of life. Are you ready? Let’s go.

Hi folks and welcome to episode 44 of the Period Power podcast. This podcast episode wasn’t what I was going to do this week. But I’m just trusting that it’s exactly what you need to hear today because everyone else that I’ve shared this with has been incredibly relieved to hear what I have to say.

But before we dive into it, I want to give a shout out to someone. I’m going to give this person a shout out. I don’t know if this is their name or just their iTunes account name but fellowacia you left a review of the podcast and you shared, “I just- damn. Thank you, Maisie Hill, this has been my audio bible and helped me build the most loving, respecting, compassionate, abundant, joyous and curious life. I am endlessly grateful for this podcast and Maisie’s existence.” Thank you so much for sharing that. That’s literally what I intended with the podcast.

So, it’s always amazing to read all of your reviews and they really do help others to find the podcast. And I want to help as many people as I can through it. So, I always appreciate how all of you help with that through your reviews as well as sharing over on Instagram etc, so thank you.

Okay, now for the thing that I want to tell you. Excuse the sirens. This is a conversation that I have been having literally on repeat for the past couple of weeks. I’ve had it with friends, with family, with my clients, even with strangers on the other end of the phone. And I sent an email out about it as well. But if you’re not on my email list you won’t have got it. And even if you are it might be hidden in your promotions or spam folder.

So, I realised that I should just do a whole podcast episode about it because even those of you who did get the email and you replied to tell me how helpful it was. I have got some additional reflections that I want to add to it. And by the way, if you’re not on my email list you should definitely get on it because I send out really helpful emails that I can guarantee will make you feel better. And I love it when you reply to them as well and let me know why a particular email or tip has resonated with you, or how you’ve applied the strategies that I share in them.

It’s always cool to connect with you over email. So, if you’re not on my list just go to my website maisiehill.com, scroll down on the homepage and sign up in the box that’s there. Easy. So, everyone I’m speaking to is tired. I can’t think of a conversation I’ve had recently where someone hasn’t commented that they’re feeling tired, or less motivated than they have been, or that they’re forgetting things all the time. Literally everyone is feeling it and I am too in case you were wondering.

So, I want you to know that if you’re also in this camp of feeling tired, it’s not just you, it’s everyone, or at least everyone that I’m speaking to. So just let that be the first wave of relief. We recently crossed over into autumn and I pay a lot of attention to seasonal change.

When I was working as an acupuncturist, I would really see the impact of the seasons changing on my clients because for a couple of weeks around the times that the seasons change. All of my clients would pretty much start reporting similar symptoms and experiences of their bodies, like changing energy levels and their pulses would change.

And I have explained this on the podcast before, one of the things that Chinese medicine practitioners do is we take your pulse, not just to feel how fast it is but to also judge the qualities of it. So, can you feel it when your fingers are gently resting on someone’s skin, or do you have to press down really deep to find it? Does it feel big, or does it feel thin? Does it feel tight like a wire? Or does it feel like it’s slipping past your fingers?

And when the seasons change there’s this period of a couple of weeks where all of your clients’ pulses seem to change at the same time. And it’s basically this idea that what’s going on externally in nature also has an impact on us internally. And I touched on this a few episodes ago when it was the autumn equinox, September 22nd, I think it was.

And I was inviting you in that episode to reflect on how you’re feeling, and I wanted to return to it today to remind you that you may well be feeling different, tired, moving slower, feeling less inclined to do the things that you usually do. And some of that could be down to the seasonal change. So that’s the context of why this might be happening to you at the moment. And I would say that this is pretty common/normal for this time of year in any given year. But I think the seasonal change is impacting us all far more significantly than it usually does.

We’re still in a pandemic and we have been for some time now. This is the second autumn we’ve had in it. And yeah, for many of us things have shifted or they’re starting to shift. Most of us here in the UK are double vaccinated. The kids are in school, restrictions have eased in lots of ways, but it is still happening. And we’re certainly still feeling the impact of the past 18 months or so. And even as life returns to normal those adjustments might also be bringing challenges.

You might be managing social anxiety, commuting again, getting used to being around other humans, being back in the office, be in environments that you haven’t been for some time. And that’s an adjustment. And part of you might be enjoying all of that and part of you might have other feelings about what’s going on. So, this is just my thought, but I do think that this seasonal shift is impacting us way more than usual which of course makes sense given everything that I’ve mentioned.

So, you know when you have those days when you just can’t be bothered, when you just don’t want to do anything, and your body is just crying out for rest? I have them too. And it’s important to honour those days. I speak a lot especially here on the podcast about how we can use thought work to overcome things like procrastination and to create focus and actually do stuff. But that shouldn’t be at the expense of ignoring your body’s request for rest, or, for that matter, your brain’s request for rest because when you ignore your body’s plea, that’s what leads to burnout.

And not to mention, a pretty shitty relationship with your body and with yourself, one where you’re pushing your body, continuously demanding that it perform for you all whilst you deny it the love, and the nourishment, and the rest that it needs.

So, here’s what I do when I’m thinking to myself that I can’t be bothered. I ask myself, is it my body that’s making the request? If it is my body asking to rest, then my litmus test for the answer is to wonder what I would do if someone messaged me to invite me to something that I would love to do. And if I would have the energy to do it because if I would have the energy then I know it’s my brain trying to avoid doing something.

And if it’s still a no, if I’m like, “Oh no, I still wouldn’t go ahead with that invitation”, then I really listen to that and I adjust my diary as much as I can so that I can rest more. And this is important. I start reducing my commitments where I can. I become more boundaried with my time and with my energy. And I also spend my time wisely. So, when I am doing things, I really try to just do one thing at a time. I find that’s a really good rule to follow.

So, if I’m creating something like a webinar for The Flow Collective then I want to just be doing that one thing. So, I’ll put my phone away. Or if I’m with my son then I won’t be trying to reply to emails at the same time which I think I’m quite good at anyway. But it means basically looking at my commitments and really thinking about what is a priority and what is not. Now, I said that I have been feeling tired. So, I have stripped things back. I’ve cancelled a couple of personal training sessions because my body was just giving me a clear no on those days.

And I’m doing less cycling on my Peloton even when my brain is going, “Come on, it’ll be great.” I’m like, “Oh, I know my brain wants to do this but my body’s kind of asking for a bit of a rest.” I also told my assistant, Kim, not to accept any invitations to go on other people’s podcasts until next year. And we’re opening enrolment to The Flow Collective at the start of November. And there are other things that we’ve planned for the autumn that I’ve realised just aren’t a match for where my body is at.

And when I think past to my experience of the last 18 months and I encourage you to do the same, and just take stock of what it’s been like for you. I felt really resilient to what’s been going on in the world. I’ve produced a lot in those 18 months. I’ve kind of kept going and really felt able to. I wrote my book, Perimenopause Power.

I created the Harness Your Hormones course that you get when you join The Flow Collective. I created 17, maybe 18 actually now, other webinars for the members, all the coaching I’ve done in there, all the behind the scenes of running a business. And not to mention the 44 episodes of the podcast. So that’s a lot to create in the space of 18 months. And I’m really good at using thought work to get things done clearly. I’ve kind of had to. And I can create thoughts and feelings on purpose like focus, and motivation, and inspiration, and creativity. And I know I can do that.

But right now, my body is asking me to do less. And I actually made that decision on day 10 of my cycle to do less because day 10, that part of my cycle is quite instructive especially when it comes to levels of energy and things because that’s usually when I have a lot of energy and I feel really capable and enthusiastic about life. But in this cycle that just wasn’t there in the same way that it usually is. And again, I know I could kind of create that for myself. But the fact that I needed to was very telling.

So basically, I’ve done a lot and now I’m honouring that my body is saying let’s slow down. And I’m entering this period of doing less and really slowing down. One of my company’s values is to create epic results without burning ourselves out. And it’s such a great filter to run decisions through. Yes, we want to have a huge impact and help as many people as we can in the best way that we can. But that will never come at the expense of my physical or mental health, or anyone on my team’s physical or mental health.

So, here’s how that shakes out. Enrolment to join The Flow Collective is open November 1st, 2nd and 3rd. And for that launch I plan to do a webinar to give you a sense of what it’s like to be a member. But as I started to kind of prepare everything we need to do behind the scenes for that enrolment period, everything was feeling really great to me except the webinar. So I went through the process that I’m outlining for you in this episode asking myself the questions I’m offering you. And I recognised that my body was giving me a no to the webinar, so we’ve changed that plan.

I’m not going to do a webinar. I’m sure it would have been fun to do, and it will be fun to do in the future. But the relief from making that decision was palpable. And it wasn’t my brain that was relieved, it was my body. I don’t want to run my business by running myself into the ground. It goes against my values and everything that I stand for. And how can I possibly show up here and teach you about the importance of rest, and downtime, and fun, and pleasure if I am pushing myself all the time?

And so much of what we do inside The Flow Collective is about doing less. And I know, you’re probably like lots of other people I know, you’ve got plenty on your plate and you don’t need lots more stuff. You just need what’s going to make a difference so that’s what we focus on. And I also realised at the same time that actually week after week I give you a sense of what The Flow Collective is like through the podcast. So, I think you already know if becoming a member is for you or not.

So, something for you to consider is have you got lots of energy? Are you running on a full tank, or do you feel like you have to be mindful, maybe even careful with the amount of energy that you have? Because there’s a big difference between being mindful of your energy and being careful with your energy. So, I think about it like this. When you’re being mindful, you’re aware of your energy levels and how you’re using your energy.

It’s like when you’ve got a full tank of petrol and you just notice how much gets used up when you go on a journey, knowing that you can refuel when you need to. Being careful on the other hand means there’s not much left in the tank, and you’ve got to be judicious in how you use it which will be familiar to those of you in the UK because recently it’s been hard to get fuel, not because of a natural shortage of petrol by the way, it’s all because of a massive shortage of truck drivers.

But there’s that element of being careful with what you’ve got left. So, if that’s where you are, please look at what can be stripped back. What can you do less of? And that might be challenging for you to do especially as doing less goes against our socialisation and our value in the world is often based on what we do. And I’ve spoken about this in previous episodes but if you’ve been socialised as female then your value is especially based on what you do for others, not to mention how you look etc, etc.

So, when it comes to doing less you might have to sit in the discomfort of that, but I promise you it is worth it. Realising you don’t actually have to do so much is worth any discomfort on the front end. And your value in the world, your worthiness has nothing to do with your productivity and what you do for others. Your value does not change according to whether you did things for other people or not. And watch where your brain goes. When you do less or when you contemplate doing less, do you make that mean things about you?

Do you berate yourself for not doing whatever it is you’ve decided not to do? Let’s say you’d planned to visit a friend or family member this weekend. But on reflection you’ve realised that actually you just want to stay at home and hang out in your PJs, maybe watch Bake Off and I don’t know, Succession is about to start. So, series 3 of Succession is coming up, everyone. So maybe you just want to stay at home and watch that. So, you decide to cancel.

And that decision might feel great because you’re thinking that you listen to your body and that it’s going to be really lovely to just chill at home. But after that momentary relief you might have a load of other thoughts that don’t feel so great. So, you might have thoughts like I’m such a flake, I’m so unreliable, I’ve really let them down, I’ve been at home enough the past 18 months. I should get it together. I should be able to see them and on, and on, and on. Do you see how it goes?

And then what you do is you spend the whole weekend in your PJs making yourself feel like crap instead of actually resting and enjoying yourself. So, you may as well just have gone. Don’t do that, either of those things. So, you have to be onto yourself and just see where your brain is going, watch where your brain is going. See what your inner critic is up to. And then you have to redirect it like when you’re talking to a child or how you might imagine yourself talking to a child like, “Yes, I see what you’re doing and no, we’re not going to do it.” So, you’re watching it and you’re redirecting it.

Now let’s return to my original question which was is it my body that’s making the request? If it’s not my body, then I know it’s my brain. So that’s when I have to have an honest conversation with myself about why I don’t want to do something. Is it because I feel emotions like doubt, or worry, or overwhelm? And if so then the solution is to go and do some thought work to explore why I’m feeling that way. And to sit with my emotions, explore my thoughts and then figure out what I want to do about it.

Or is it because my brain needs a rest? Now, you’ve got to be onto yourself with this one because this can be sneaky, like a permissive way of opting out of doing things that intimidate you. But that being said, brains do work well when we give them space and when they’ve had a chance to rest and just switch off but that means real space. It doesn’t mean scrolling. Scrolling doesn’t count as space.

So, if your brain is asking for some rest then give it that. Lie down. Do something calming. Do something that brings you pleasure. Read some fiction. Cook a meal without rushing. Masturbate. Look at old photos. Go for a walk. Whatever feels restful, and nourishing, and pleasurable, and fun to you, go do that. It’s essential that you do this. And remember The Flow Collective opens for new members November 1st, 2nd and 3rd. So, stick those dates in your diary. Make sure your name is on the wait list and that you’re getting my emails.

We’ve been getting loads of lovely messages from you asking when you’ll be able to join. Because the last time we opened was June, so it’s been a while. And after this we’re not going to be opening the doors until next year. And what happens every time we go through an enrolment period is we always get messages from people who wanted to join but didn’t find out in time. And we’re very strict about the deadline. I have a no stragglers policy. So, I’m going to give you some pointers to help you avoid disappointment.

Add a reminder to your diary for November 1st. And then see that in your diary, you can go to my Instagram profile and get the link to join. And if my emails go to your promotions folder in Gmail then just find one of them and drag it to your primary inbox so that you actually see them. You can also add hello@maisiehill.com to your contacts. And if you reply to an email from me, you’re more likely to receive other emails from me instead of them ending up in your junk.

So, if you do one of these things then you won’t miss the enrolment period and you’ll also get all the other helpful emails that I send out every week.

Okay my lovelies, that is it for this week. I hope it’s brought you some relief and an opportunity to consider how you’re feeling and if anything needs to change to support yourself physically and mentally. I will catch you next week.

Thanks for listening to this week’s episode of the Period Power podcast. If you enjoyed learning how to make your cycle work for you, head over to maisiehill.com for more.